"REAL Talk With Nelle Belle"

CAT FIGHTS...OVER DOGS

Let me start by giving a disclaimer: I KNOW THAT ALL MEN ARE NOT DOGS! In fact, I realize that the overwhelming majority of men are human, and some are even Heaven-sent. But I’d like to discuss an issue that appears to be the root cause of cattiness between women on every reality show and on every block. You guessed it….MEN!

I find it strange that guys have such an easy breezy method of dealing with one another when it comes to females. It’s like a man code that can’t be broken by a hot-tempered woman. A guy can see someone eyeing his woman and can just state “that’s my girl” or just subtly wrap his arms around her waist without saying a word. They just leave it at that because what’s understood doesn’t have to be explained.  But females on the other hand, are standing by with their backs arched and claws out, ready to attack any woman who even seemingly thinks about or speaks negatively (truthfully) about her man (who often isn’t her man at all).  Let a chick look at a girl’s man with interest in her eyes, she will loudly be asked “What are YOU looking at?” while the possessive woman calls for back up for a non-issue. Some say that you should be flattered that someone else admires what you have. If no one wants it, then it may not be that good! Be clear that admiring and coveting are two different things and you should never covet what someone else has.

The great rapper Jay-Z once stated “I got 99 problems, but a [female] isn’t one” yet many of the problems females encounter are somehow entangled with some male. Flavor of Love, The Bachelor, For the Love of Ray J, and the Ultimate Catch all depict women fighting and plotting over one man’s love. Speaking of Flavor of Love and all of its foolishness…The most memorable cat fight was when Pumpkin temporarily lost her whole mind and spit in New York’s face! Meanwhile, Flave was somewhere fantasizing about Bootylicious Deelishis. Another memorable cat fight took place among America’s most tan, greasy, fist-pumping cast…Jersey Shore! Sammi was upset about the letter the girls wrote about Ronnie’s infidelity, which eventually brought Sammi and JWoww to blows.  There is still an ongoing debate about who won, but as Evelyn Lozada would say, that’s a non-factor. The truth of the matter is that Sammi should have dealt with Ronnie. I mistakenly called the Jersey Shore crew the most tan cast, but I stand corrected. The Jerseylicious girls somehow managed to make themselves more orange than the Oompa Loompas running Willy Wonka’s Factory. Tracy and Olivia have been feuding every season over a guy. They’ve brought their drama from the work place, to the club, to sonic. The truth of the matter is that Tracy should have just gotten over the fact that Olivia’s man is her EX and moved on in season one.

I see plenty of young (and old) girls fooled into thinking that sleeping with a man somehow gives them ownership of that man. Well, it never has and it never will.  If a man is actually yours so to speak, the there should be trust and respect between the two of you. You should also be secure enough in your relationship to understand that there is no competition and no need to go crazy over a man. I’ve seen high school girls waiting after school or going to a person’s neighborhood to fight over a guy. Sadly, that guy is with another girl while you’re outside scrapping with no shoes, no earrings, and a greased up face. Understand that a guy who is worth your time won’t be the cause of you fighting woman after woman. Keep your shoes, your extensions, your pretty face, and most importantly, your pride and move on! Entertain a single man who enhances your life, not a dog who can’t stay in his own yard.

Written By: Nelle Belle