"There's So Much More Than What You See.."

ACT LIKE A LADY...THINK LIKE WHO?
Media as the "Relationship Counselor"

Let me first start off this blog by saying that I commend Mr. Steve Harvey for writing his book "Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man," and giving women incite on his thoughts and opinions with relationships. It is great when men can actually speak and engage in discussion about relationships because indeed like Rob Base said "It takes TWO" and usually that line of communication from both parties plays a large role in the success of relationships. So for that, I appreciate the art and respect the perspective.

Secondly, I will like to say that the movie was hilarious!!!! Kevin Hart is quite comical and I have already seen the movie twice for pure entertainment and laughs, if you have not seen the movie yet...let me just advise you to use the bathroom before you watch the movie because you will laugh so hard you might tinkle...just a warning! BUT ANYWAY...let's get to the real purpose of my blog.

I wanna pick your brain for a minute. What is one of the main things we know about the media? That it is an avid money maker, everything about media is about money...KNOW THAT, UNDERSTAND THAT AND EMBED THAT IN YOUR HEAD! NOW...what are some of the MAIN things that sale with the media... Of course, sex, violence, social status (clothes, brands), body enhancements (anything with weight loss, make-up, skin care, etc.)...but none the less RELATIONSHIPS SALE LIKE GLAZED DOUGHNUTS AT KRISPY KREME WHEN THE HOT NOW SIGN IS LIT! Think about what most of the reality shows are stemmed from, most of the topics from talk shows, the existence of soap operas, and lastly the reason many "hopeless romantics" buy books and watch movies like the Notebook.

Every individual in this world will encounter a point in time that they will be in a relationship with someone. And there is a 99.5% chance that there will be conflict in that relationship, and 99.9% chance that one of those individuals will seek outside advice with dealing with the conflict, whether it is from a book, TV show, magazine or even Internet site. There are some things that are logical, and I understand that everyone is not logical and need some of that common sense to just be dropped on there heads from time to time. But, I really do not understand how some individuals will take a book, movie or magazine and use it as their "relationship bible." Many of the points are so generalized just like a "daily horoscope" that people fail to realize somebody is writing this because they knew people will buy it, so why not? And I for one am not mad at the individuals who write to make money, hey we all have to make a living and who am I to knock your hustle, I just feel sad for individuals who mold their brains into believing every bit of advice that someone gives you...and letting it conform your life. Do I have advice for your relationship? NO, but I am sure if you ask the person you are in it with, they may have something to say when discussed at the right time and in the right place. Now, if that person doesn't want to talk about your relationship AT ALL (not meaning right when you want to at that very second), then maybe you need to evaluate whether or not you want to be in a relationship with someone you can not communicate with or can not compromise. That's all I am saying. And don't let the media, friends or family tell you who to be with and make decisions for you. Look at the signs of an unhealthy relationship if this is you then get out or get help, if not then make up your own mind about who you want to be with.

If you don't know the signs of a unhealthy relationship here is a link to a brochure (and if you know someone that is going through an unhealthy relationship, print it out and give it to them!)
Brochure: 10 Signs of being in an Unhealthy Relationship

If you are experiencing an unhealthy relationship, please seek help from a legitimate relationship counselor, not from anyone that just wrote a book or an author from a magazine.

AND if your relationship looks like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2QQ87wlaFqg

PLEASE Get some help from a legitimate counselor LOL!

No but seriously, don't let the media make decisions for your life. You are the one that has to be with that person everyday, not the talk show host you got advice from nor the magazine and I am pretty sure they won't be keeping you company when you are alone by yourself from some advice they gave you and caused you to go ballistic on your partner, and leads you to being left a lone with a large box of Kleenex, bucket of ice cream and a 90's R&B mix playing in the background. By the way, you ever wonder why some of the BEST singers (R&B especially) that sing about love and make the BEST LOVE SONGS, have some of the WORST relationship issues...R. Kelly, Micheal J, Usher, Marvin Gaye, LOL. I'm just saying.

Ladies, the movie Think Like A Man was great, entertaining, and for some that did not think that the advice was somewhat common sense, then I am sure it was very informative, but don't start acting Sistah Souljah out here on your partner, and be left in the battlefield a lone. Talk to the person you are suppose to be in love with and in a relationship with. If there are problems you can not work together and resolve, do not be ashamed to seek counseling from a professional that can analyze your personal situation and not give generalized advice without knowing anything about the two of you.

Written By: Jimmeka Anderson